Article #7145

Olly Robbins’s testimony will have been painful for the PM. The No 10 omnishambles was publicly laid bare – and Keir’s fresh out of scapegoats

‘How dare Olly Robbins not have made me look like a chaotic, unprincipled plonker?” is an interesting defence for a prime minister to go for. But we are where we are. Never mind “this is the future liberals want”: this is the past that Keir Starmer wants. What follows is the alternative branch of history the endlessly victimised PM apparently wishes we’d lived through instead.

In this version, he chooses a career liability to be US ambassador, who is well known to have been big pals with a notorious sex trafficker of underage girls and to have spent years involved in questionable business associations, some with Russian and Chinese firms. He immediately announces the appointment. When that guy is deemed a risk by the famously stringent developed national security vetting process – seriously, who’d-a-thunk-it?! – then Starmer has to go out and tell the public that the wrong ’un isn’t actually going to be his US ambassador after all, for “reasons”. Not to be one of the many people who has to explain how basic politics works to the PM, but after that notional fiasco, we’d have spent a very long time indeed talking about his bad judgment. Just like we are now. It’s almost as if all branches of history lead to a discussion about Keir Starmer’s bad judgment. The only person who doesn’t judge this to be the situation is Keir Starmer, which is another instance of his bad judgment. Monday found him chuntering away at the dispatch box like an arsonist complaining about the price of matches.

Marina Hyde is a Guardian columnist